Tactics used against transgender victims
- Using pronouns not preferred by you or calling you “it”
- Calling you pejorative names
- Ridiculing how your body looks
- Telling you you are nota real man/woman
- Telling you that nobody would believe you because you’re transgender
- Ridiculing or belittling youridentity as a bisexual, trans, femme, butch, genderqueer….
- Claiming they are more “politically correct” and using their status as an L, G, B, and/or T person against you
- Claiming they know what’s best for you, how you should dress or wear makeup (or not), etc.
- Denying access to medical treatment or hormones or coercing you to not pursue medical treatment
- Hiding or throwing away hormones, binders, clothes, etc.
- Eroticizing/fetishizing your body against your will
- Touching body parts you don’t want touched, or calling them by terms they know you find offensive
- Telling you they thought you liked “rough sex” or “this is how real men/women like sex”
- Telling you that nobody will ever love you
- Telling you you don’t deserve better and/or would never find a better partner
- Threatening to “out” you to your employer, friends, or family members
- Negating your personal decisions
- Threatening to take the children or turn them against you
- Forbidding you to talk to others about transgender topics
A substantial document that includes information about the prevalence of sexual violence against transgender/gender non-conforming individuals; lists common long- and short-term responses to trauma; addresses the question of whether there is a relationship between sexual assault and gender identity issues; discusses issues associated with WPATH Standards of Care and Informed Consent models as they relate to sexual assault survivors and how their gender identity issues are assessed; describes the typical set of services available to sexual violence survivors in their own communities, including how transgender survivors can advocate for their inclusion and/or respectful treatment within such services; provides recommended reading and resource lists of self-help books, websites, and listservs, with annotations describing how well they address transgender survivors and SOFFAs and their issues; and gives quotations from other transgender sexual violence survivors.
This guide will point users toward internet-based directories of therapists specializing in working with transgender clients and/or sexual violence survivors; offer tips and an interview guide potential clients can use to evaluate a given therapist’s approach and potential fit; briefly describe major trauma treatment modalities; and review issues associated with potential conflicts of providers who follow WPATH Standards of Care and the needs of survivors who also need to focus on healing from sexual abuse/assault.
Both seasoned and inexperienced daters increase their chances of having a safe as well as pleasurable date when they take just a few precautions. This trans-specific dating tip sheet covers issues such as where to meet and what to do before you leave that meeting place; the pros and cons of hosting, going to your date’s place, or somewhere else; tips on asserting your boundaries; and how to use everyday technology to increase your safety. Also discussed are some of the pros and cons of various ways and times to disclose a trans status or history.
A brief two page handout detailing some tactics used against transgender victims and by transgender perpetrators of domestic violence.
This safety planning tool can be used used as a guide for trans people, by friends/peers, and by professionals who are helping a transgender person consider safety options while living in an abusive relationship or planning to leave one.
- Giving Voice: Gender Identity and Sexual Trauma
- Ask GearHead (question on spouses reaction to her trans lovers balding and similarities to her abuser)
FORGE Newsletter on DV (November 1999)
- Medical Abuse “Domestic” Violence: Not Just a “Family” Matter (michael munson)
- Domestic/Sexual Violence & Gender Identity: You wanna talk complex? (Lindsay McBride)
- Domestic Violence within our Community (Rich Jentzen)
- labels and lies (tamlin)
- Sexual Assault in the Transgender Communities (Arlene Istar Lev and S. Sundance Lev)
- Are you in a domestically violent relationship?
A Guide for SOFFAs of Transgender Sexual Violence Survivors will include similar content and sections from the Self-Help Guide for Transgender Sexual Violence Survivors, supplemented with discussions of how secondary survivors are impacted by a loved one’s sexual abuse/assault; advice on self-care and finding support for secondary survivors; and tips on supporting a primary survivor. Quotes from other SOFFA secondary survivors will be featured throughout.
LGBT Anti-Violence Web Resources (may not be trans-specific)
Coalition of 40 American lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender survivor programs – Community United Against Violence
Working to end violence against and within lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, and queer/questioning (LGBTQ) communities – Gay Men’s Domestic Violence Project
Gay Men’s Domestic Violence Project supports victims and survivors through education, advocacy and direct services – Minnesota Center Against Violence & Abuse Electronic Clearinghouse
Section on lesbian, gay, bisexual, and trans resources – The Network/La Red
Founded in 1989 to address abuse issues in queer women’s and trans communities – Remember Our Dead
Memorial to people who have died as a result of transphobic violence – Stop Abuse For Everyone (SAFE)
Stop Abuse For Everyone (SAFE) is a human rights organization that provides services, publications, and training to serve those who typically fall between the cracks of domestic violence services, including men, gays and lesbians, teens, the elderly, and immigrants.
FORGE hosts email lists for providers and survivors. To join a list, send an email to AskFORGE@forge-forward.org
Please indicate if you are a survivor, loved one or provider who would like to be added to the email list(s).
Articles and Research on Transgender Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault
Transgender & SOFFA Domestic Violence / Sexual Assault Resource Sheet LGBT organizers and service providers (and non-LGBTs) often report that there are no transgender-specific resources available on domestic violence or sexual assault. This is changing; in 2010, the Obama Administration funded FORGE to begin developing transgender-specific sexual assault resources for both professionals and survivors.
There is also a growing number of studies on transgender survivors (and perpetrators) of domestic violence and/or sexual assault. In this fact sheet, we highlight some of the most important research, advice, and resources.
Turn to page four of this handout to learn some specific tactics used against transgender victims and by transgender abusers.
101 things you can do. We are all responsible (2010) FORGE
Sexual violence, elder abuse and sexuality of transgender adults age 50+: Results of three surveys (2008) – Loree Cook-Daniels and michael munson
In press (will be available at http://www.forge-forward.org): FORGE (2011)
- Mapping the transgender experience: A guide for professionals
- Serving transgender sexual violence survivors
- Reaching out: Connecting to the transgender community
- Providing immediate post assault health and/or forensic care to the transgender sexual violence survivor
- Providing routine health care for the transgender survivor of sexual assault
Trans and intersex survivors of domestic violence: defining terms, barriers, & responsibilities – Diana Courvant and Loree Cook-Daniels
Gender non-conforming youth and sexual assault – Shannon Wyss
Lesbian, gay male, bisexual and transgendered elders: elder abuse and neglect issues – Loree Cook-Daniels
Injustice at every turn: A report of the national transgender discrimination study (2011) – Jamie Grant, Lisa Mottet, Justin Tanis, et.al.
Sexual violence in the transgender community (2005) FORGE.
Practical tips for working with transgender survivors of sexual violence (2005) – michael munson and Loree Cook-Daniels
Services outside of the box: Helping your (transgender) clients navigate sex-segregated services (2010) – michael munson
Trans accessibility project: Making women’s shelters accessible to transgendered women (1999) – Allison Cope and Julie Darke
Domestic violence and LGBT people: Annual reports (1998 through present) – National Coalition of Anti-Violence Programs
Why it matters: rethinking victim assistance for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer victims of hate violence & intimate partner violence (2010) – National Center on Victims of Crime and the National Coalition of Anti-Violence Programs
Seeing past the “L”: Addressing anti-male bias in sexual assault services for the “LGBT” community (2005) – Loree Cook-Daniels
Quick tips for providers – michael munson
In your house: Responding when you suspect relationship abuse. – Avoid Strange Men, 1(1), 21-29. Gunn, J. L., & Goldberg, J. M. (2002).
Lines in the sand, cries of desire – Wilchins, R. A. (1997). In C. Queen & L. Schimel (Eds.), Pomosexuals: Challenging assumptions about gender and sexuality (pp. 138-149). San Francisco: Cleis Press